Early friendships teach toddlers valuable social skills. Help your child practice empathy, communication, and conflict resolution to nurture strong, lasting connections.
“A friend is someone who helps you up when you’re down, and if they can’t, they lay down beside you and listen.” — Winnie the Pooh
Key Concepts
Your toddler's first friendships help them practice emerging social skills. Children (and adults) navigate the social world by seeing (reading social cues and understanding context), thinking (perspective taking), and doing (acting on what they see and think). Friendships in early childhood usually start based on having something simple in common (same backpack), shared activities, or convenience. Over time, children's friendships deepen.
What to Try
- Help your child to practice reading and understanding the cues of others by discussing facial expressions, practicing active listening (eye contact and attention) and considering the thoughts and feelings of others.
- Role-play tricky friendship scenarios, like the playground or birthday parties. Practice skills that help your child to navigate their environment more successfully
- Have play dates! Be thoughtful about who you invite. Choose a location that helps your child to thrive, and structure an activity to support shared fun.
- Talk about friends. What makes someone your friend? How do friends make you feel? Encourage your child to show forgiveness towards friends and themselves. As their parent, don't speak negatively of other children, or label children (positively or negatively).
- Remind them that friends have good days and hard days, and that friendships go up and down like the waves on the ocean. For example, if your child tells you someone wouldn't include them in play, take a moment to say, “That’s hard. Sometimes friends are busy playing something and don’t let someone new in. What did you say back?” Pause and wait for your child to respond, and then, “Do you need a suggestion for what to say (or what to play), or are you moving on to something else.”