Caregiving Long Distance

We live in a very transient society. Whether we choose to move because of job relocation, or a desire to live in more agreeable climate, many older adults have adult children who live in different states or regions of the country.

When it comes to caregiving – it isn't necessary or always possible for caregivers to live in the same community as the older adult. If you live an hour or more away from the older adult, you are considered a long distance caregiver.

Families should decide together how to divide the caregiving responsibilities. It is best to have this discussion before the need arises and there is an emergency situation. If possible, include the older adult in this discussion and use his/her wishes as a basis for the plan. There are many ways a person can help to care for their loved one from long distance.

Organize Paperwork

One task that many long distance caregivers undertake is handling the older adult's paperwork. The caregiver should create a file to have all the information in one place that can be easily accessed when the time comes. Include the older adult's full name, birth date and place, a copy of the birth certificate, social security and Medicare numbers, along with financial information such as income tax statements, credit card information, bill payment schedules, living will, and durable power of attorney in a place where any cash or valuables are stored. Remember that paperwork needs to be kept in order and up to date.

Research Community Services

The Internet is a tremendous resource for caregivers to research community services and nearby facilities. Compile a list of reputable agencies and facilities in the older adult's community in case you need help in the future. Include home health agencies, rehabilitation facilities, nursing homes and assisted living facilities.

It is important to be prepared in case of an unexpected illness or injury. Research the community services that are available in the older adult's community. Is there a nearby senior center to provide meals and social interaction? What sort of programming does his/her church provide for the seniors?

Arrange For Professional Help

The situation may call for an expert to be there with the older adult. From long distance, a person can select a geriatric care manager. The geriatric care manager is a medical professional who can evaluate the older adult's needs and coordinate care through local resources. The initial evaluation cost varies and may be expensive, but may be a valuable resource.

Emotional Support

Long distance caregivers can provide emotional support by calling or contacting the primary caregiver. Call the caregiver frequently and get him or her involved with e-mail or Skype if possible to facilitate further communication.

Handle Communication

A long distance caregiver can be the older adult's communication point person. Making the phone calls to other relatives and friends and sending email updates is a valuable way a person can contribute when they do not live near by.

Make a Visit 

If you live far away, but can make it there for an occasional visit – go prepared. In advance, make a list of possible problem areas to look into during the visit.

• Attend a doctor's visit with the older adult. Have him or her sign a release of information form so the doctor's office will share information with you after you return home. Be sure to give the office your contact information.

• Evaluate the older adult's driving ability. This can be a very sensitive topic for the older adult. If you're not able to have the conversation, talk about it with their doctor, geriatric caregiver, or other family members.

• Investigate the sorts of meals your loved one is able to make. Is he or she able to go to the grocery store and prepare healthy meals? If not, research to see if the community offers Meals on Wheels or the local senior center serves low cost lunches.

• Determine home safety. Put new batteries in the smoke detectors. Is the electric and plumbing in good working order? Install grab bars in the bathroom. Is the home free of clutter? Is it clean?

• Assess your loved ones personal care. Do you they have body odor? Are they able to wash properly and are they keeping good care of their teeth or dentures? Poor hygiene can be a sign of depression or early dementia.

• Does the older adult have a personal emergency response system? There are advancing technologies coming out regularly, including buttons that can sense a fall if someone cannot push it, GPS systems, monitoring systems, medication reminders and more.

As in any caregiving situation, it is important to know your strengths and to set your limits. Preparation and local support are key in making sure your loved ones are connected to you and your caregivers.

References: National Institute of Health – National Institute on Aging Aging Wisely (www.agingwisely.com)