All I do is feed — Guide for parents of 1 year olds

Your baby is learning to communicate through cries and states of awareness. By responding to their needs, you help build trust and emotional regulation. Here's how you can support their development and attachment.

Your baby uses their cries as a way to communicate with you.
There are Six States of Awareness to be familiar with. Your baby will cycle through these in their day. Crying, active alert, quiet alert, drowsy, active sleep, deep sleep. Babies have a challenging time managing the intensity of their emotions (due to a lack of self-regulation skills). At the beginning, their ability to calm down is reliant on your ability to soothe them.
Everytime you respond to your baby, you are letting them know they can rely on you, which helps to build their sense of safety.
Touch can help promote regulation and brain development. This can be done through baby massages or skin-to-skin.

Be a Behavior Detective and “chase the why” behind your baby’s cries. Are they tired? Hungry? Cold? This will be an important skill that you continue to use as your child grows up.
Use your baby’s state of awareness to help you understand their behavior and meet their needs as they come.
Notice your baby’s likes and dislikes - this is connected to the idea of responsive
- Observe them - what do you notice? Do they turn their head away when you en visitors arrive? Sleep better with white noise?
- Notice patterns - is there a difficult time of day? What can you do to support their success during that time?
- Use trial and error - do they prefer the window open or closed? Do they prefer bouncing or rocking?
- Stay calm - in order for your baby to co-regulate, they need to “borrow” your calm.
- Maintain compassion and empathy - keep your developmental expectations in check and remember what baby is capable of.
Use touch and infant massage as a way to soothe your baby. If doing a massage, make sure to use an unscented fruit, nut or seed oil.

Your feeding routine may be developing. It is normal for your needs and plans to change as your baby grows and you get to know each other.
Feed your baby 4-5 ounces of milk for their feeds, every 2-3 hours. Usually babies at this age are feeding 1-2 times a night too.
Pay attention to what your baby is like after each feed. If they are consistently seeming hungry after a feed, check with your pediatrician about increasing ounces.

At this point, you may be introducing pumping if you haven’t already, or you might be transitioning to exclusively pumping.
Your baby might show signs of preferring a certain bottle. If you’re struggling to find a bottle that works, try a bottle sample pack.
Nipple shields are thin silicone covers that you can wear during breastfeeding. These can be helpful giving the baby a larger surface to latch on to. It can also help protect tender areas. Check with a lactation consultant if you’re thinking about using a nipple shield or feel that you need one.

More sleep has been linked to improved attention, behavior, learning, memory, emotional regulation, quality of life, and physical and mental health. Less than the recommended number of hours of sleep has been linked to attention, behavior, and learning problems.
Your baby’s wake window is slowly increasing. They may be able to stay awake for 1.5-2 hours now.
When your baby is overtired, their body produces hormones (cortisol and adrenaline) to stay awake, making it harder for them to fall asleep.
Your baby’s brain is wired to detect patterns, so having routines (especially relating to sleep) is essential.
Your baby is not yet ready to begin sleep learning. Healthy sleep habits can help from now until around 4 months of age (when babies are generally ready to learn to sleep).

Make sure your baby gets enough sleep and keep their sleep tank full by offering them the chance to sleep every 1.5-2 hours.
Continue to work on creating a bedtime routine that works for your family. Slow things down with less stimulating activities like reading, cuddling, massage, or singing.
Control your baby’s sleep environment as best you can. Consider using white noise machines and blackout shades.
Place your baby down to sleep when they are drowsy but awake - that sweet spot. This begins to let them learn how to fall asleep on their own. Make sure that you are not feeding them to sleep.

Skin-to-skin has many benefits, including promoting regulation and brain development. When you hold your baby skin-to-skin, oxytocin is released, which can help regulate baby’s temperature, weight, heart rate, blood pressure, and sleep.
Parentese is the high pitched sing-songy voice that you use when talking to your baby (or dogs). This voice is how babies learn best. This is different from baby talk, as you’re using real words and correct grammar.
Filling your baby’s day with words in one of the most important things you can do. Sportscasting is one way to do this - say what you are doing throughout the day, like a sportscaster. Note: you don’t need to do this for everything! Just moments through the day.

Spend time doing skin-to-skin with your baby. Put your baby in just a diaper and place them on your bare chest. This can be part of your baby’s nighttime routine right now, as it’s incredibly calming for them. Include your partner, too!
During diaper changes and feeds, you are the perfect distance from your baby’s face. Let them see your face and watch your mouth move.

Fourth trimester - human babies are born early due to the size of the infant head and the birth canal. The fourth trimester is a term used to describe the first three months of a baby's life, where they are still developing a lot.
By meeting their needs during the Fourth Trimester, you are practicing sensitive and responsive caregiving. This connection is essential for their development and your lifelong attachment relationship with them.
Postpartum anxiety and depression are still common at this point. Both can impact your ability to form a secure attachment.

Don’t forget about you! Pay attention to any symptoms you might have like mood swings, irritability, excessive crying, etc. If you notice that those feelings are coming and NOT going and/or you feel that you aren’t able to care for yourself or your baby, please seek help via your baby’s medical provider. Feel free to reach out to u if we can support you in any way.